Valentine’s Day is fast approaching and it’s got you wondering whether this is the time to reach out to your ex boyfriend. Nothing would be more wonderful than reuniting with the man you love, right? It seems like a great idea. In your mind all you have to do is text him or give him a quick call to wish him a Happy Valentine’s Day and all that transpired in the past will be forgotten. Unfortunately, that’s not the way relationships work. As much as you believe that reaching out to him right now will help mend all the broken fences between you two, it won’t. This is not the time to try and rebuild your fractured connection. You don’t want to put yourself in a vulnerable position unless you’re certain he’ll be happy to hear from you.
Don’t Let Valentine’s Day Cloud Your Better Judgement
It’s hard not to focus on love, commitment and happily-ever-after around Valentine’s Day. The images of hearts and romantic lovers are everywhere, from the television to magazines. You’re bombarded with the reminder that February 14th is a day for people in love and the fact that you don’t have the man you love in your life right now, stings.
You must do everything within your power to block out the visions of love and romance that are dancing in your head. The fact that you still love your ex doesn’t mean that you have his permission to text him and wish him a great day. This gesture is more than likely going to make him feel very uncomfortable and it’s probably going to result in him blocking you completely from his life. As much as we think Valentines’ Day is all for us, men put great value in it as well and the mere fact that he heard from you on such an emotional day may be more than he can bear.
Try and view the day as just another day. Make plans to hang out with other single female friends or have dinner with a family member. Don’t focus on the day as the ultimate opportunity to reconnect with your ex boyfriend. You’ll probably do more damage than good if you attempt this so make a vow to yourself that you’ll get through the day without reaching out to him in any way.
Respond Only if He Contacts You First
In the event that your ex boyfriend is awash with sentimental feelings and he is the one who calls or texts you to with you a Happy Valentine’s Day you certainly should respond in kind. You need to be mindful of how exuberant you are in your response though. You want to temper how you react to his kind words by sharing a message that reflects his own, in terms of emotional sincerity.
In other words if he sends you a very understated, “I hope today is a great day for you,” don’t reply back that you miss him like crazy, that he’s the only man you’ll ever love and that you wish you two could just stop the madness and get back together. If you do this, you’ll quickly make him regret reaching out to you at all. Instead, reply back with something similar to what he wrote in tone. Perhaps a quick, “Thanks! Hope you have a great one too or, “Wishing you a fantastic day too.”
You must always allow your ex boyfriend to set the stage in a scenario like this. Even if his words don’t hold as much emotion as you would like, don’t lose sight of the fact that he was thinking of you on the most romantic day of the year. That alone speaks volumes about where his heart is at the moment.
Show Him the Depth of Your Emotional Maturity
If you allow Valentine’s Day to come and go without a peep from you, your ex boyfriend is going to view that as a sign of your emotional maturity. It shows that you’ve respected him enough not to try and use the day as a tool to regain his interest. Most men who have recently broken up with their girlfriends will candidly admit that they dread the day because they assume they’ll have to deal with an overly emotional and irrational ex girlfriend talking about the past and what went wrong.
Show your ex that to you it’s just another day and that you’re moving forward on a path that focuses solely and completely on you. A man doesn’t want to reunite with a woman who can’t let go of the past. He wants a woman who embraces the here and now and one who learns from the things that have happened up to this point in her life. Show him that’s exactly who you are by staying off his radar on Valentine’s Day. He’ll become more intrigued with you when he sees that he wasn’t at the top of your priority list of people to call on that special day.
Never forget the golden rule of getting a man back and that’s to make him think you’ve moved on and aren’t waiting impatiently for him. Men often long for women they can’t have so show him that you can live with or without him on any day, including the most romantic day of the year, and the man won’t be able to get you out of his mind.