“My ex boyfriend just texted me! I don’t know how to respond.” Did you ever imagine you’d get so tied up in emotional knots over a simple text message from your ex boyfriend? Of course you didn’t. You probably also never imagined that the two of you would be broken up, right? You felt that the relationship was “the one.” You loved him desperately and now you’re just left with a feeling of desperation because he’s decided to take some time or he’s not in love with you anymore. None of that really matters at this point. You’re just completely focused on the fact that he’s texted you. How exactly should you respond? I’m here to help you navigate that road so you say exactly the right thing back to him.
Before you respond at all consider what you really want for your future. If you’re just desperately missing your ex boyfriend in this moment, you may make a crucial mistake by hooking up with him again when you know in the back of your mind that it would be a horrendous error that will leave you devastated again. If you’ve been thinking about him constantly and you truly miss his presence in your life and you feel that you two together could work through the issues that pulled you apart, you need to be cautious with how you approach him from this point forward. Don’t lose sight of the fact that your ex boyfriend’s motivations for sending you a text may be very different than what you hope they are.
Now, look at the text and think about why he sent it. If it’s a simple, “hey, how are you,” he’s probably looking to reconnect in some fashion. If it’s more direct such as, “do you want to get together today,” he’s going through a spell of really missing you and you need to be mindful of how you react to that. Some men just miss the intimacy that they shared with their ex girlfriend and that’s what drives them to send a message in the hope that she’ll be willing to share her body, but not her emotions.
Exactly How to Respond When Your Ex Boyfriend Sends a Text
My best advice for responding to an ex boyfriend who sends a text is to give it at least a couple of hours before you text anything back to him. That way you’ll have to time to gather your thoughts and he’ll have time to cool down if he’s feeling anything but genuine longing for you.
When you do respond keep it very simple and short. If he asked how you were, just text back, “I’m good and you?” This immediately throws the ball back in his court and it will be up to him to follow through with his true intentions.
One side note that I believe is incredibly important is that if your ex boyfriend and you had a very difficult break up and he’s been playing the hot and cold game with you, be wary. Some men take to pumping up their egos by mistreating their ex girlfriends. These type of men will pretend they want to get back together, only to push you away again. You don’t want to become a pawn in that.
If that’s the pattern that your ex boyfriend has been following, my best advice is not to respond to his text messages at all. If you do, you’re essentially handing your emotional power to him on a silver platter. He’s proven that he can manipulate your feelings so it’s important that you put a stop to that now.
Most of us don’t fully recognize the power of text messages and how they can alter a relationship. There are certain, specific text messages that you can send your ex boyfriend that will actually make him crave to be with you again. You can learn more about that here.